I’m at this point where I want to claw my ears off because I don’t want to deal with ear infections anymore

Why can’t my body be normal and use the natural defenses it has I swear

Like oh. You want to go swimming????? Shower???? WTer???? hahahHAHAHaHa NOPE I CAN’T DRAIN WATER ANYMORE JOKES ON YOU

ngoziu:

Illogical. There exist no such device to measure—

my levels of sass captain

(via cauthons)

concentratedridiculousness:

speckov:

#oh man  #but how guilty would chekov feel after that #what if he’d done that calculation #what if he’d been quicker #he was manning that transporter and someone died#it wasn’t his fault but that would weigh heavily upon him  # he’s only 17 goddamn  # and even after he’s talked himself out of thinking it was his fault  # there would still be that nagging feeling in the back of his mind every time he sees spock  # shh come here let me hug you chekov (via that-is-illogical)

do you wanna also talk about how he was Chief Engineer for ONE DAY and the Enterprise was practically destroyed and at least dozens of crewmembers were killed, including - however impermanently - Jim?  do you wanna talk about how none of that was his fault but it must have felt like it anyway?  if only he’d noticed the leak sooner, if only he’d been able to figure out how to fix it, if only he’d kept a better watch on the engines, if only he’d been shrewd like Scotty and just known something was wrong?  because I do nOT WANT TO TALK ABOUT THAT

(via a-fantastical-phantasm)

steveholtvstheuniverse:

skoothsmin:

science fiction was invented by a woman

don’t you ever fucking forget that

in mary shelley we trust

(via all-my-babies)

kawaiicornsnake:

I think the real question is why should a girl shave, preen and diet herself into oblivion for a guy in sweatpants and a t shirt who hasn’t trimmed his pubes in 3 years

(via all-my-babies)

ollivander:

what you need to know about face characters at disney world

(via a-fantastical-phantasm)

gyzym:

You know, a few months ago this dude friend of mine showed up to hang out with me all dejected. Over a couple of drinks he explained his long face — earlier that night, he’d been walking down the street behind this really cute girl, and when she looked back at him over her shoulder, he thought it was in interest and smiled at her. Now, this guy is tall and skinny, can most commonly be found in glasses and t-shirts scrawled across with math jokes, is kind to animals, considers himself a feminist. What he doesn’t consider himself is threatening, so he was surprised, confused, and even hurt by what happened next: the girl in front of him responding to his called greeting of, “Nice skirt,” by taking off down the darkened street in a dead run. 

“Yeah,” I said, “she probably thought you were going to rape her.” 

“But that’s not fair,” he said. “I’m a good person; I’d never rape anyone! How could she think that? She doesn’t even know me.” 

Out here in the wilds of the internet, I often find myself making arguments about shit like feminism and rape culture unilaterally. For one thing, there’s so much (like, so much) out there arguing unilaterally against this shit that I feel it’s necessary; for another thing, ‘round these parts there’s a lot of people jumping to hostility when it’s painfully clear they don’t have a handle on all the facts. But I’m more lenient with the people in my real life, especially dudes like the one mentioned above. I’m willing to extend to them a patience that I wouldn’t with strangers on the internet, because they matter to me, and it matters to me that they understand. So when my friend sat there that night, whining over his beer and responding to my attempted explanations with, “But I’d love it if a girl smiled at me on the street, or even catcalled at me! Fuck, even if a dude did it, I’d be flattered,” I decided to spend some time thinking about how to clear things up for him. It took awhile, but I finally came up with a metaphor to get the job done:

Consider the bank. 

Read More

miss-love:

“I heard police or ambulancemen, standing in our house, say, “She must have provoked him,” or, “Mrs Stewart, it takes two to make a fight.” They had no idea. The truth is my mother did nothing to deserve the violence she endured. She did not provoke my father, and even if she had, violence is an unacceptable way of dealing with conflict. Violence is a choice a man makes and he alone is responsible for it.”

-Patrick Stewart

This man.

I love this man.

(via mystolenthunder)

tacoposey:

what if we just created a fandom for a tv show that doesn’t exist and we build it up really big and make a ton of inside jokes until the internet just accepts it as a real show and it starts getting included in polls and gets it’s own imdb page and a group of outsiders go crazy trying to find dl links

(via singarequiem)

superwholockwhedonversetribute:

I love how

in all the cast photos

everyone’s being stupid

and Mark Sheppard’s just

on the end like:

(via benbrz)